So much better when the stipper is crying

There are just some things that can't wait until Monday for an answer. So here's one more question answered by your gallant cavalier in a pimp suit.

i need help!

my aunt is a stripper and recently i vented to her how my college life is sucking my bank account dry. well she went behind my back and showed her boss pics of me at the beach in a bikini and now he won't quit bugging me to come work for him.
i repeatedly told him no that i do not want to strip cuz i have way more respect for myself and that i would never stoop that low and make a disgrace of myself, however this guy won't stop calling me and harrassing me. he even tried bribing me by saying that if i come work for him at the strip club that he would take care of all my college expenses and make sure i have extra money on the side. this guy won't take no for an answer! how do i get him to get it through his head that i do not wanna strip?? i just want him to leave me alone for good. please help!!!!
Feisty Redhead

Galahad answers: Ouch. Way to denigrate your aunt and all the other sex-positive people in the world who don't think that being an exotic dancer or other part of the sex industry makes a person less-than. Next time a stripper gets raped, assaulted or murdered, remember: she's not really a person, so its not a crime.

Stop answering the phone if you don't want to work for him. Pretty damned simple.

Questions to your EmCee

Seems after the "Hijacked Advice" the other day, people have decided to send along some of their own questions. Lets have a go, shall we?

Dear Galahad,
I'm 36. Me and my Bf (i refuse to say the word ex) have been together for 14 months. In the beginning, I made some mistakes. Galahad, please tell me, how is it possible to just not show any emotions. This man once told me we were soul mates. He bought me a commitment ring over the summer, and told me after the break up that he did think about marrying me. How is it possible now, that he won't see me in person. He broke up with me in an email. How do I get him to show emotion over this? How do I get him to look me in the face and truly hear what I have to say? I am destroyed over this and I really need so help.
Thanks
Princess Not-so-Happily Ever After

Galahad answers: Things happen and people change. We are all growing. In relationships, we either grow together or we grow apart. If we stop growing, then we might as well be dead. No one is going to know what changed for this guy to make him go from considering marriage to breaking up except him.

Men tend to handle guilt more severely. Good odds he can't be in your space because he feels so bad about the change in situation.

How to get him to look you in the face, show emotion, and be completely present and attentive as you unleash your anger and frustration?
Easy - Kidnap him, strap him to a chair in the basement, duct tape his mouth shut and let loose the rage. To ensure that he shows emotion while you do this, you could drug him, but putting lit cigarettes out on sensitive flesh is easier to measure dosages.

If you think that is a good idea, get an appointment with a therapist. This has obviously affected you, and you are not appearing to handle it very well. Lots of people want to vent their spleen when they get dumped. Hurt people hurt people. Do you really want to hurt him? Do you really want to force open all the things that are held privately by him just to placate your own interests? Is that fair? Is that right?
If you really want help getting un-destroyed, go talk to a counselor or therapist.

Happily ever after... what a boring way to end a story. That means there'll never be another adventure. So sad.

Okay, so I recently told my boyfriend that I want to have a threesome with another girl. Like, I've wanted to for a reallyy long time! But he said he didn't want to because I'm the only girl he wants and he doesn't want to share me and stuff. But I REALLY want to have one! Should I just respect his views or keep trying to get him to have one with me?
Misty

G: Thanks for the pic, you look quite young. And because I can't tell how old you are, that picture has been deleted.
If this is the only guy you are ever with, I feel sorry for you. Life's ahead. Eventually you'll get a shot at what you want. If he won't give it to you, there are probably plenty who will. College is great for that kind of thing.


Hi Galahad,
My boyfriend and I just started having sex, but the sex isn't really interesting, just missionary and occasionally girl on top. I'm too shy to ask him if he wants to mix things up, but sex is getting really boring and I need to figure something out.
What do I do??
p.s. One time I got the courage to ask if he liked doggie-style and he said he thought it was rediculous...that embarrassed me..lol
Penny P

G: Bail. You're not married to this guy, so you don't have to suffer bad sex. Honestly, if he's freaked out by the third most common position (and often most pleasurable for women) then he's going to need to work out his hangups before he can be a meaningful sex partner to anyone. This schmeckle is obviously not interested in your sexual fulfillment, so stop wasting your time.


Are bi sexual girls real?
Rick

G: Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.


Send you questions, comments or feedback to Galahad.email@gmail.com and I'll see what I can do.